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Health & Fitness

Chapter 4: The Bad News

This is probably not going to work out well for you. And to be honest, that's mostly on you. Because you're a self-centered, questionably motivated Super-Villain and your Sisyphean determination often works against you in the dating arena. While I recognize the drive, intensity, mental fortitude and acuity it takes to achieve this station in life, at the end of the day you want control of everything. Most of the world at large will presume that you are a colossal dick for that and demand a super-powered response. It's an ancient game.

A game you and your like have consistently lost. There'd be a lot fewer condos in hollowed-out volcanoes if your side could even reach the Mendoza line in world domination attempts. Recognizing your limitations right away will be a huge help in negotiating the mine field ahead. By necessity, almost all of your non Super-Villain relationships will begin with a lie. A lie that will only get bigger and eventually burst like a diseased appendix. Whether the relationship is damaged or destroyed depends on how well you navigated around the truth up to that point.

This inevitability can be used to your advantage if the path leading to it has been thoughtful and without malice. Cruel lies or pure self-service are always deal breakers but anything that spares her feelings or provides legal cover might be viewed less harshly in time. You know you're lying. You can at least try not to be a colossal dick about it. Achieving a relative state of non-colossal dickishness will go a long way towards lessening the damage when you are found out. If she walks, let her.

As a Super-Villain with global dominion on your To-Do list, you have to know a lot of things about a lot of stuff and a lot of people. Coupled with your belief that you can bend any situation to your will makes you an Alpha stalker. Let her go. If she forgives you? You are breathing rare air indeed, my friend. Inhale deeply and savor it because what you expel in the form of words will determine what, if any, type of possible future the two of you may have.

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