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Health & Fitness

It's A Doggy Day Care Life

There are a million doggy day care places in the naked city…

Okay I apologize if that sounded a bit over the top to begin a piece about dogs and their day care. You should know however, that we take our doggy business very seriously here in Long Beach. From our ever popular dog beach, to the hip 2nd street doggy discotheque "Pussy and Pooch", to our Long Beach Museum of Art elegantly showcasing the fashion forward trends in Dog Architecture, we are constantly in a state of canine celebration. (Sorry cats, but feel free to still hang out underneath that Chevy Astro van and plot your world domination.)

 Okay, so anyway, back to my point... About a year ago, we decided to start occasionally bringing our very own Murph Doggy Dogg to a wonderful place called "Bark Bark". If you were to ask me the reasoning behind this at the next "Mutt and Mingle" or "Yappy Hour", I am sure I would mumble something about the importance of "socializing" Murphy with other dogs, before tucking back into my drink. The truth however is that it can be quite hard on the psyche to leave your dog alone in the house day after day. As we ready ourselves for the workday commute, Murph will expertly give us his trademark “sad puppy in the pound” look as he is relegated to kitchen and backyard area. Even as we hide American-made chicken treats like Easter eggs all around, and make sure 103.5 is playing softly in the background so that Celine Dion and those edgy lads from Matchbox 20 may hang out with him all day, Murphy still looks as if he is auditioning for the next SPCA commercial with Sarah McLachlan. I had no idea our kitchen could be the equivalent of a Guantanamo Bay prison cell.

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With the fervent tail wagging, the excessive jumping up and down and the wolf wanna-be howls, Murph tells us he is generally overjoyed to come to Bark Bark. It also makes us feel great to know that he is hanging out with other dogs all day, no doubt discussing important dog topics of the day such as the absence of Obamacare for dogs, and the top fire hydrants in town.

But then, just a few months ago, something terrible and wonderful happened at Bark Bark.

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They installed video cameras. Now we could watch the goings on at Bark Bark from the discomfort our own workplace!

Being unproductive at work has never been so easy.

I will spare you the minute by minute details of my 9-5 surveillance while I should have been preparing for meetings and the like, but I will tell you that a few big themes have arisen from being able to watch my dog all day.

1) I don't think my dog actually likes other dogs. The video clearly shows that Murph Doggy Dogg seems rather bemused at the other dogs, rather than taking part in their silly antics. I am thinking of doing one of those DNA checks and see if he has any cat lineage.

2) I think my dog is trying to pick up girls. Not girl dogs mind you. Actual girls. Whenever a female employee walks into screen, I soon see Murph trotting up to her, trying to get a scratch or a pet. If he had thumbs, I am sure he would try to get her phone number. He has, as they say, “game" with the ladies.

3) All day doggy TV doesn't seem to help. Today I was late to 2 meetings, fell behind on 3 different projects, and when all is said and done, I still miss the little dude very much.

I can't wait for him to tell me about his day.

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